Friday, June 27, 2008

Give Them Ears to Hear

The assisting minister and I process into the church during the prelude every Sunday morning. Every Sunday when we get to the altar, we both do a little head bow, and I say the same little prayer: "Lord, give them ears to hear."

In other words, I've done my best to bring them your word, God. Now it's up to you to make sure that word doesn't return to you empty.

Apparently the Holy Spirit hasn't pulled the cotton out of everyone's ears just yet, my weekly prayer notwithstanding.

Yesterday I found out through the grapevine that two people in the congregation are upset with our current communion practices, because we commune young children. Way back in the day you couldn't receive communion until after you were confirmed. In the 1980s the standard practice lowered to around 5th grade, and in most places has been trending ever lower since (my home congregation now offers first communion instruction to first graders).

But I don't open communion to young ones to be trendy. I open it because I honestly believe in my heart of hearts that they are welcome at the table and I have no ground nor right to deny them. It's Jesus' party and he opens his arms to all.

Some folks would argue that children are not old enough to "understand" communion properly. Well, if that's the criteria, then I don't know that any of us are worthy to be standing at that altar, because I'm 31 and have been regularly participating in the Lord's Supper for the past 20 years, have an undergraduate degree in religion, and a Master of Divinity, and I still don't understand the full scope and mystery of what's happening as we commune, but new layers of understanding have certainly opened up to me over time.

So I don't believe it's so much about understanding, because that understanding will gradually grow as the kids grow, and will reveal itself through their praxis and ongoing conversation with the rest of the body of Christ. Given my druthers, I'd be communing every one of them, but I leave it to the parents' discretion (most seem to feel kindergarten is a good age to start), and when they feel the child is ready, I begin this lifelong discussion with some age-appropriate instruction, then set them free to participate and just relish the gift (because if anything, that gift, that unmerited grace, is so much of what communion is about).

But I digress. Back to having ears to hear. . .

It's not the criticism itself that I find discouraging, that I can handle (though it's always more helpful if it's constructively phrased).

What's discouraging is that this criticism once again came to me through the grapevine. This is a nasty and unhealthy habit of this congregation and I have tried many and various ways to break them of it. As this most recent episode proves, we've clearly got a long road still ahead of us on that score. Sigh.

What's discouraging is that the critics in question thought it appropriate to carry on a loud and bantering conversation about this (loud enough to disturb the worship of those around them) during communion. It's the grounds for a wickedly funny Python-esque sketch, having an inappropriate debate during communion about what's appropriate during communion, but in this case I'm not laughing.

What's discouraging is that the critics in question only just noticed we're communing kindergartners this past Sunday. We've been doing this for the last three years, and the children help distribute and collect cups during communion, so they commune at the end with the other helpers - that's every Sunday for three years of kids standing on an elevated platform in the front of the sanctuary when everyone else if finished and sitting down, and these folks just now realized the kids are receiving communion when they're up there. I mean, how willfully and consistently do you have to check out in order to not notice this? And what else are they not paying attention to? And who else is at this level of willed ignorance? Paging all chuggles!

What's discouraging is that, clearly, among the other things they are not paying attention to are my sermons, the newsletter, and the weekly Bible study, because I have tried to widen the conversation, to open up people's understanding of and thoughts about communion, in all of those places and formats over the past three years.

So, now I'm trying to think through how to communicate to these folks (and any others out there who have the same questions or concerns but haven't verbalized them yet) in a form they might actually hear, in a way that does not reward or affirm sending criticism through the grapevine.

Any suggestions? I'm all ears. . .

Peace,
C.

1 comment:

Choralgrrl said...

Hiya!

Got a worship committee? Can they help to think this through?

We talked about this very thing at Pilgrim, and I remember having that exact discussion (Anyone who fully understands Holy Communion, please raise your hand...)

Struck me as sort of the same "older doc" mentality that has medical interns working insane numbers of hours in a row: "I did it. So should you."